NYC SantaCon 2004 - Saturday Dec. 11th.
What is Santacon?
It's a not-for-profit, non-political, non-religious & non-logical Santa Claus convention. We do it for absolutely no reason whatsoever. SantaCon happens in major cities all over the world. NYC SantaCon 1998 was a blissful three-day affair with more than 100 Santa's flying in from all over the country as NYC hosted the national event. SantaCon 1999 was extremely successful with one longer day and approximately 80 dirty Clauses. SantaCon 2001 was a single day condensed non-stop blowout with over 150 red suits of naughtiness! 2002 was chock-full of bars, parties, subway rides, shock appeal, dirty xxx-mas carols, jingle balls, elf insubordination, Harry Hanukkah, and non-stop ho-ho-hos, with plenty of visitors from around the globe, many friends from L.A. and SF to boot. And last year, with close to 400 Santa's, we wowed them in Grand Central & roamed across Harlem & caroled outside the Apollo Theater. There were stripping Santa's in the East Village and bowling reindeer games in Central Park all accompanied by the usual decadence and debauchery only residents of the North Pole could appreciate.
This year, Santa's will back with a new naughty & demented list of places to wreck havoc on. So get the reindeer and sled ready, 'cause it's going to be a bumpy ride. We may visit some of the traditional Santa haunts and some new ones as well.
Here is the 2004 411 from Santa...the day is Saturday December 11th. Expect to start in the morning around 10AM. A hotline number will also be available if you want to try to catch up with the Santa's, mid rampage. Santa highly recommends spending the whole day until midnight, when you will be delirious and exhausted and you'll be shouting at strangers or mumbling to yourself and the whole thing gets blurry and you wake up the next day in a gutter in the South Bronx. The kick off is at 10am for an extra special treat. The place will be revealed in due time.
This venerable tradition is almost a decade old, and makes flash mobs look like sitting at home watching C-SPAN. Picture archive at http://www.santarchy.com/archives.html.
How to be prepared:
Definitely bring some money and ID and an all day metro card. It's not uncommon for a spontaneous chant of "Santa Needs A Beer!" to initiate the invasion of a bar. Or also times when "Santa needs sophisticated adult entertainment"
A bottle of water and some snacks is a good idea.
If you bring your own alcoholic beverages PLEASE be respectful of the bars Santa is being allowed to enter and don't drink it IN the bar. Drinks will be cheap at most of the bars we'll be invading so you may not even have to bring your own, unless you're like Santa and have a lifetime membership to AA.
Comfortable boots are a good idea.
Dress warm, it will probably be very cold and we will be marching around outside at many points of the day. There will be some points indoors where you will suddenly be overdressed. There is nothing wrong with Santa stripping.
Bring your "Holiday Spirit" as you understand "Holiday Spirit", which is to say Santa's are encouraged to let loose, be obnoxious, make a mockery of the holiday, act in a confusing, disorienting & demented manner to holiday shoppers . . . BE SURLY. Yell. Sing naughty carols. Experiment with interpretive dance in front of traffic. But on the other hand do not leave all your good judgment behind. Be aware and try not to do the obscene stuff in front of children, try not to make people feel unsafe, and don't get sent to the hospital or jail. OK?
Bring gifts you can give out. If you want, bring naughty gifts to give grown ups. If you want, bring nice stuff to give kids. If you want, bring coal to give evildoers. It's all up to you, Santa.
YES! YOU MUST BE wearing Santa/holiday/whatever theme wardrobe. Yes! You can come dressed as an elf/snowman/reindeer/Chanukah Harry/A Sandwich. But you gotta be something and be the hell out of it. No spectators allowed. NO! A Santa hat is not enough. Get a Santa suit. Make a Santa suit. Transform those red long johns. If you don't have any creativity, buy something. If you don't have any money, be creative. If you don't have any money and you don't have any creativity, slap yourself three times and ask god to help you.
Note: You get what you pay for in a Santa suit. $10 suits are made of thin, cheap flannel that won't keep you warm and will rip in the crotch. Nuff said.
2004 Santa Suit Sources:
There are bunches of costume shops and places to get Santa suits in NYC. Now for all you non-Santa suit owning heathens, here are some places to start.
Stores:Gem stores are good for the $10 felts suits.
Rite Aid, Duane Reade, Walgreens, are great places for cheap santa hats and skirts.
Manhatten:Halloween Adventure on 4th Ave and 11th st.
Restoration Hardware on Broadway and 22nd st.
Party City on 14th St.
34-14 Steinway St, Long Island City, NY 11101
(718) 482-9129 (fax)
If you have ANY questions whatsoever email Santa at firstname.lastname@example.org and expect to be belittled and berated.
HO HO HO HO!!!!!!!
Be Well, Be SANTA
---Brought to you by your local Santa---